For the first time ever in my life, while I was in gorgeous Ladera in impeccable Saint Lucia, I took a full body snap of me in a bikini. While this might be the type of "content" you find from fashion and lifestyle bloggers, I have never been one to be filled with this kind of body confidence to post anything even remotely resembling the photo above. My entire childhood was wrought with teasing, aka bullying. Not only was I the only Asian in the entire school, but I was also really, REALLY fat. Like grossly overweight. It wasn't until my senior year of high school I became thin: to be specific I went from a women's size 16 to a women's size 4. (For men, I think this is about a 36 waist to a 25/26 waist).
I was THIN! Yet deeply unhealthy and unhappy.
Fast forward almost two decades. I haven't grown to love my body more. I think, with time and age, I just stopped caring. I stopped caring what other people thought about my body and just wanted to wear a frickin' bikini and enjoy it --> I say this with a bit of trepidation because I am not sure I would have snapped this photo if I wasn't by myself, in my own plunge pool, with this breath-taking scenery of Saint Lucia's UNESCO World Heritage Pitons behind me!! I have worked hard on my body this summer -- with the assistance of Barry's Bootcamp and a "relatively health diet" as is recommended -- and so while at Ladera I decided to take my body selfie.
I felt as good as I will feel at Ladera -- no wonder it's Oprah Winfrey's favorite place -- and whatever I end up doing with my professional life, I just wanted to put this post out there so people can know when they look at me I am not the "super confident" woman coming through on their network television screens espousing monetary policy, foreign affairs analysis and nerdy political details. I am someone just trying to figure life out ... but I am SO LUCKY AND BLESSED because I do have these once-in-a-lifetime opportunities to live a beautiful life.
It's as the Trump International Hotel and Resorts in New York told me: " Believe in yourself. You are braver than you think, more talented than you know, and capable of more than you imagine." (Quote attributed to Roy T. Bennett.) Here's to all of us being brave and living up to our fullest potential, without judgment!